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Is Anyone Listening?



I think it is amazing how many people use cuss words, expletives or vulgarity when they talk. Those words are used today more than ever before.


Is there a reason people feel they must cuss or use an expletive or be vulgar or to make a point?


In the past, we used words like “very” happy or we may feel “terrible” but now, too many times, many people feel that there must be an expletive word inserted in front of those words to emphasize, or overemphasize, the impact of their words in the conversation.


One example is, during one of the final NFL playoff games, a well-known actor was talking about the football game and every sentence he spoke included at least one or more expletives (cuss or swear words). They would say it was the XXX coach or the XXX player or the XXX official or the XXX reasons the play worked or did not work.


Why do they feel they need to use cuss words, expletives or vulgarity for others to listen? When I was young, we were told we “could not” cuss until we were older and out of the house. Does any mature, secure person honestly think that another person’s cussing is an act of maturity?


Do people feel that no one is listening or understanding the impact, or possible importance, they feel they are sharing if they do not cuss? Can’t we be incredibly happy or very mad without an expletive? Is anyone listening to what we have to say if we do not use an expletive?


As I mentioned in the other article in today’s newsletter, titled “I Do Care,” it seems that when we hear someone else say something or do something around us, we now think, because “they” did it that it is right and the way we should act or talk. 


Why does anyone think imitating another person’s negative or poor attitude makes them a better person or makes the situation any better?


In too many relationships, a couple that says they are in love uses expletives when showing anger, fear, hate, judgement, labeling, love or prejudice toward someone or something. If we are in love, isn’t there a better way to share our emotions with caring and helpful words to express ourselves than feeling we need to use an expletive?


If you have a spouse or significant other, does he or she use expletives when talking with you at home? Do you feel they use those words to see if you are listening? Are they attempting to be more decisive or stronger in their words just because they use an expletive(s) in the sentence?


Any sentence that requires the use of expletives or yelling or screaming or talking loudly is not a productive sentence. Does anyone feel that a person that uses expletives sounds smarter? Do they realize that they can sound immature and insecure when they are not able to express themselves without an expletive?


We can help others if we, as caring and helpful and respectful as possible, ask them if they know that they do not need to talk to us that way, using expletives, when they are talking to or with us. They may say “they know but that is just the way they talk” but you could also ask why they feel they need to talk with expletives. Do they feel they must talk that way for you, or anyone else, to listen to them?


If we concentrate more on our conversation or concentrate more on the value of what we are saying with less concentration on using some expletive that has no true, clear or defined meaning, the people around us will listen and understand more. The point of every conversation is much clearer without expletives.


We are just asking others to understand they do not need to feel we need their cussing, expletives or vulgarity to get their point across. We are just asking them to speak with care, helpfully and intelligently. 


We are listening.


If you, or someone you know, would like to schedule me to present the speech on Achieving Unity or schedule prime time with me as a Sr. Life Transformational Coach for better communication and to help you resolve issues, at home, the office or socially, please contact me today at 303-362-8733 (303-Focused).


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