Episode 69 - Rosemary Olender

July 05, 2026

WATCH THIS EPISODE LIVE ON YOUTUBE

Guest: Rosemary Olender

Rosemary Olender is an educator, consultant, speaker, and non-fiction author dedicated to strengthening connection, confidence, and resilience in families and communities.

Drawing on decades of professional experience and real-world insight, Rosemary helps parents, educators, and mentors understand how values, communication, and everyday moments shape confident, emotionally healthy children.

Her work offers practical, compassionate guidance that empowers people to navigate challenges with clarity and purpose.

At the end of today’s podcast, Rosemary will also share a special gift with listeners to support them in applying these ideas right away.

Episode Transcript

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Hello, and welcome back to another encouraging, inspiring, and including episode of the Achieving

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unity, leadership system,

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weekly podcast, where we help turn chaos into connection,

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and purpose into action.

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I am your host, Mark Intrican, founder of the Achieving Unity Leadership System.

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Also known as the Unity Leadership System, that is available at www.

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Achieving unity leadershipsystem.com.

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Which is dedicated to the leadership system by improving lives.

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Through encouraging, inspiring,

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And, including others.

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I am honored today to introduce another truly remarkable guest.

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Rosemary Olander.

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Today, rosemary is an educator.

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Author, speaker, and consultant who has spent years helping families,

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Educators and communities

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Build confidence, connection, and resilience.

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Through everyday moments that truly matter.

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Her work is grounded.

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practical and deeply human, speaking to people who want to grow without feeling.

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Overwhelmed, or judged.

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As we begin, I invite you to listen with curiosity.

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And kindness. You may hear ideas that connect with your own life.

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Your family, your journey, and your work with others.

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This is a conversation

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meant to spark reflection,

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Encourage questions, and offer support you can carry forward in a simple,

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Meaningful way.

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But first, before we delve into this insightful discussion,

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Let me briefly introduce.

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my company, Reality

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focused dynamics, where it all began.

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Chiva Unity Leadership System Podcast is relatively new.

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Many of you have saw it before as achieving unity success formula.

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Well, the success formula is still the heart.

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of the process, it's more than just a formula.

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It is a system. It has real conversations.

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For leaders that are navigating division.

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Frustration and change,

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Including your family, your community,

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And everywhere you go,

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We appreciate you being here, and let us know, give us feedback.

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On this new layout, our new slides, and…

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where we're going. Next slide, please.

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Leadership sometimes today,

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Doesn't it feel just a little bit harder?

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Then it should? When we look at leadership,

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Seems like it should be a little bit easier.

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But today, connection… I'm sorry, disconnection seems to be growing.

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We're losing some of the connection that we've had in the past.

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The frustration that we have today is truly draining on us.

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The people. The teams that we work with.

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The teams at the office. The teams at work.

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The teams would goof off with, the teams we'd play with.

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So much frustration.

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so much issue.

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The good intentions that we have, and the things that we've been taught,

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Our culture are colliding with what is real,

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world pressure. So that's what we teach and what we share.

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Unity is not just a soft skill.

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Unity is a leadership strategy

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That we must focus on.

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And let's be focused every day.

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Going forward.

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Next slide, please.

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So what do we mean by achieving unity?

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What we mean by achieving unity is encouraging progress,

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Without enabling dysfunction.

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We've heard about dysfunctional families, dysfunctional offices, dysfunctional workplaces.

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Why don't we put that back into a functional process?

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Achieving unity. Communication. Communication and collaboration are key.

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to everything that we do. Get the negativity out of it.

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Let's quit finding wrong and finding problems.

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Let's look at the value ahead of us.

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We need to be inspiring action.

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Without forcing agreement.

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nodding our heads when, no, we don't agree.

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Sometimes when people are talking, and they say that word right,

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And then keep talking? They say, well, that's right, right? And keep on talking. They don't pops.

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It's time for us to make the pots.

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To stop things. Start…

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not agreeing, without knowing more.

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Including the voices.

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While maintaining accountability.

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Sometimes if the voices in our head saying,

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I don't think that's what I'm believing. I don't think that's right.

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I think we need to speak up in a positive way.

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Including others.

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Inspiring others and encouraging others.

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We need to work together to be building better businesses.

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better lives in a better world.

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One conversation.

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At a time.

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Again, thank you. I am your host. I am Mark Entrakin, founder of Reality

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focused dynamics, and the Achieving Unity Leadership System.

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These are processes that we can use every day.

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in everything that we do going forward.

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I work with leaders,

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Teams and families,

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navigating conflict.

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change and complexity.

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Helping us move forward.

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with clarity. Unity.

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And sustainable action.

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As part of my work,

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I also help people access the legal shield protection.

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In moments like these, clarity and unity

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Sometimes also require legal guidance.

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Identity protection. Somebody you can talk to without spending thousands and thousands of dollars.

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That's one of the things that I work with in my process.

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That's what I want to be, is get focused.

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on how we can't protect ourselves,

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As we continue building unity.

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As I talk about focused, let's go to the next slide and break it down just a little bit more.

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Focused. This is my trademark.

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F-O-C-U-S-E-D.

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Focus, facilitate on, clear,

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Unified, sustainable execution and delivery.

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That's where it is. Facilitate.

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Tough conversations that build trust.

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Not rude. Not anger.

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No hate. No prejudice.

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But there's still tough conversations that bring out the truth.

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And build a trust with each one of us.

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on common ground and shared purpose.

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That's where we must be.

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Common ground. We hear all the time about

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Everybody should know that.

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Well, everybody doesn't. It's not common sense if everyone doesn't know.

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We must be clear in our communication and our agreements. That's the C.

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clear on communications and agreements. We must be unified.

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Yes, unified actions across our differences.

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Everyone's not gonna agree on everything. We know that.

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I know I like the Broncos and the Saints.

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Some other people like other football teams.

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That's okay. Between the whistles before the play starts, and then when the play ends, okay, yes.

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There's all kinds of crazy stuff going on on that football field, but we don't have to take it home, we don't have to take it in our heart.

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And the players don't have to take it with them.

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We can leave it on the field once that whistle blows.

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We also have to be sustainable.

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Build results that last.

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We have the ability to be unified,

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And the things that we do without creating arguments. We must build results.

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And then execution, and that is so important.

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You see it there in bold.

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Consistent, responsible action.

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That's it. It's not something just…

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By the wayside, this is a system that we're working on.

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consistent, responsible action.

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Which brings us to delivery.

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Inspired growth and lasting change.

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Change is short-term, improvement is long-term,

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And that's where we go with our delivery to take it.

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To wherever we're going in our life.

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And the lives around us.

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Next slide, please.

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Oh, and don't forget, I forgot to put the app at the bottom of the screen. 303 Focused, that's my phone number. That's the office number.

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That's in the center of our logo, Focused. F-O-C-U-S-E-D.

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It's what we are focused about.

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And again, you can call me anytime, 303-362-8733.

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And if you forget the number, go to your keypad.

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303FOCUSE D.

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You got it. Let's get focused.

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Thank you.

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What can you expect? That's what we need to work on.

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What do we expect in everything that we do?

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Number one, real-world insights and skills rooted in the focused approach.

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Being focused. We have compelling stories of people.

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who have achieved unity in leadership.

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Where you work, your employment.

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Your family. It's all there.

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It's about stories that we have.

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Achieving unity with each other.

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Practical strategies for clearer, more effective execution and delivery.

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And don't forget that delivery. Don't forget those actions.

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It's us taking those steps,

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One, direction,

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forward. Focused.

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conversations. They need to be engaging.

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supportive, and deliver actionable value.

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Don't forget that word, value. We talk about certain…

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Processes such as anger, wares of value?

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We want to make sure there's value in what we do,

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And we deliver those actionable values.

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All centered, all of this, all centered on helping each of us.

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Built stronger.

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more cohesive.

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Teams. That's the direction we're going, and that's what we can do.

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Today.

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Here's the invitation.

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If unity matters to you,

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The achieving unity leadership systems supports all leaders.

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through coaching and advisory engagements.

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Contact us. We want to help grow forward.

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Courses. The courses and facilitated workshops.

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You can put the course on, do it online, do workshops online, or at your office.

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Wherever you are, make it work.

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make it happen. We have keynote speeches.

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All leadership conferences.

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all-hands meetings. These keynote speeches will bring

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Key.

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open the doors. They've been locked.

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For so long. Achieving unity is the path.

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to stronger relationships.

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Inspired leaderships.

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And, again.

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Lasting change.

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Doesn't that seem like what we would all want?

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That's where we need to be, and that's what we want to be focused.

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growing forward.

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What you need to do? Contact us.

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It's easy. Let's promote clear, unified, sustainable action

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Starting now. Starting today. Don't put it off till tomorrow. Let's do it today.

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Reach out to explore coaching,

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Courses and workshops, or speaking engagements,

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To promote unity and leadership everywhere.

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Achieving unity is the path.

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It's a stronger relationship. Inspired leadership.

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And lasting change.

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Get in touch with us. We're looking forward to hearing from you.

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Upcoming conversation. We have a great conversation today, a great podcast interview, but starting next week…

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We'll have Tonya Lehman. She'll be here.

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Empowering people to speak up.

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As we talked about earlier, let's, don't be quiet.

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Just don't let things go, let's speak up.

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And that's what Tanya will be here to talk to us about.

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The week after that, Todd Levinson will be here.

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Creating deeper social connection.

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People we work with, people we…

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do things with.

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Home, work, family, community, it's all about creating a deeper connection.

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That's what Todd will be here to talk to us about.

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On February 11th, Alex Shaheed and Andy Intrekin, my cousin,

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We'll be here talking about leadership,

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Protection, and trust.

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Let's get together, come back. Put this on your calendar.

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We'd love to see you here every week.

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But today's guest, I am so thrilled that she's here today.

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It's amazing how parallel.

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that Rosemary and I are in what we do,

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And how we take things forward.

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It's a beautiful process of how we can grow with others.

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She's an educator, consultant, speaker, and nonfiction author.

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She dedicated her time to strengthening connection,

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confidence and resilience, and I love the word resilience, and how she works with it.

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In families and communities.

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Drawing on decades of professional experience and real-world insight.

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Rosemary helps parents, educators, and mentors understand

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And mentors understand how values,

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Communication in everyday moments.

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shape our confidence, shape us emotionally,

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And help us raise healthy children.

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Her work offers practical, compassionate guidance that empowers people

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To navigate challenge with clarity,

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And purpose. That's what we all need, and that's what we…

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wanted as a child, even though sometimes we think it's discipline.

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It's actually learning.

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So by the end of today's podcast,

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Rosemary will also share a special gift.

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with listeners to support them in applying these ideas right away.

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And actually, if you don't mind, I'll ex… I will share that with you right now.

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And give you the marker, the QR code,

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to get there. So once we go to the next slide…

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Here's the two QR codes right now.

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current… the QR code on the left?

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is how to connect with Rosemary. She's available anytime.

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Watch your phone,

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Use that QR code, get in connection with her.

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Talk to her. Set up some time with her.

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On the right, you'll see the other QR code.

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That's access to Rosemary's free gift.

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She has a questionnaire for you.

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That will help you in learning what she does.

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But there's only so much I can tell you.

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Let's get Rosemary on here, and let her tell you more about what she does, and let's get some

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Questions going, and I know some of you will be on…

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line today, so maybe listening to this later.

00:15:50.000 --> 00:15:53.000
Get in touch with her when you can. But for now…

00:15:53.000 --> 00:15:56.000
Let's go rosemary! Rosemary, how are you doing?

00:15:56.000 --> 00:15:59.000
I'm doing great, thank you. How are you? It's good to be here.

00:15:59.000 --> 00:16:06.000
I'm doing… oh, wonderful. I'm so glad you're here. It's exciting to have you. Just to be able to talk about

00:16:06.000 --> 00:16:10.000
The things that you do, and where you're going, and what you've done,

00:16:10.000 --> 00:16:14.000
It seemed like there's such a beautiful story.

00:16:14.000 --> 00:16:16.000
How's your book?

00:16:16.000 --> 00:16:20.000
You're copying wisdom, a father's Legacy to Living a Rich Life,

00:16:20.000 --> 00:16:25.000
came to life over cups of coffee with your father.

00:16:25.000 --> 00:16:28.000
Could we start by hearing what inspired this journey?

00:16:28.000 --> 00:16:29.000
Educator to an author?

00:16:29.000 --> 00:16:31.000
Sure. Sure.

00:16:31.000 --> 00:16:34.000
Um, many…

00:16:34.000 --> 00:16:37.000
30 years ago, 34 years ago, in 1991.

00:16:37.000 --> 00:16:41.000
My father was in the hospital, and we knew he…

00:16:41.000 --> 00:16:44.000
wasn't going to be with us much longer.

00:16:44.000 --> 00:16:52.000
So, I had a conversation with him, which actually ended up being my last conversation with him the night before he passed away.

00:16:52.000 --> 00:16:57.000
I was sitting at his bedside, and he took the time

00:16:57.000 --> 00:16:59.000
to say to me,

00:16:59.000 --> 00:17:03.000
I need to apologize to you and your sister.

00:17:03.000 --> 00:17:06.000
And I was…

00:17:06.000 --> 00:17:11.000
rendered speechless, and I'm not usually speechless, but it took me a few seconds, and then I thought,

00:17:11.000 --> 00:17:13.000
I said to him, Dad,

00:17:13.000 --> 00:17:15.000
I know you're sick,

00:17:15.000 --> 00:17:22.000
And I know that you know how sick you are, but are you also crazy? Do you not understand?

00:17:22.000 --> 00:17:26.000
that Tony, my sister, and I,

00:17:26.000 --> 00:17:33.000
feel like two of the richest people in the world, and it's all because of what you have given us.

00:17:33.000 --> 00:17:36.000
And he said, I don't understand. I'm leaving you…

00:17:36.000 --> 00:17:44.000
with a house that doesn't have very much marketable value, with a car that's a used car,

00:17:44.000 --> 00:17:46.000
And nothing in the bank to speak of.

00:17:46.000 --> 00:17:50.000
And I sat back and I said, Dad, those are not

00:17:50.000 --> 00:17:53.000
the gifts that…

00:17:53.000 --> 00:17:58.000
You gave us that made us the successful individuals we are,

00:17:58.000 --> 00:18:05.000
And two individuals who feel like we were blessed the day we were born, to you and mom, and won the lottery that day.

00:18:05.000 --> 00:18:10.000
Um, and he said, I don't understand, so I said, well, let me explain.

00:18:10.000 --> 00:18:13.000
So, for the next 40 minutes,

00:18:13.000 --> 00:18:18.000
In my head, I started thinking about him as a parent,

00:18:18.000 --> 00:18:24.000
And as a early teacher of mine, and said, okay, let's talk about

00:18:24.000 --> 00:18:26.000
the gifts you gave us.

00:18:26.000 --> 00:18:33.000
And out of that conversation, I spent the next 20 years, while I was still working,

00:18:33.000 --> 00:18:37.000
Sort of jotting down reflections and memories and…

00:18:37.000 --> 00:18:44.000
and ideas about, okay, let me shore up why I thought of these gifts. Why were they so critical to my growth?

00:18:44.000 --> 00:18:48.000
And my ability. And people have always complimented me. From when I was

00:18:48.000 --> 00:18:50.000
In grade school.

00:18:50.000 --> 00:18:52.000
that I was self-confident,

00:18:52.000 --> 00:18:58.000
Some teachers thought I was a little too aggressive with my opinions.

00:18:58.000 --> 00:19:05.000
Um, because if I saw something that needed to be done, or I cared about somebody, I intervened.

00:19:05.000 --> 00:19:09.000
So, over the years, I jotted down these ideas.

00:19:09.000 --> 00:19:14.000
But I was still working. And then from 2003, when I formally retired,

00:19:14.000 --> 00:19:22.000
Until COVID, I did a lot of educational and family consulting around the state of New York.

00:19:22.000 --> 00:19:26.000
And I didn't have the time to write that book, but I did write a book that was

00:19:26.000 --> 00:19:32.000
was, um, critical to my work life, and that was my first book called

00:19:32.000 --> 00:19:42.000
Um, the school-home connection, forging positive relationships with parents. Again,

00:19:42.000 --> 00:19:43.000
Right.

00:19:43.000 --> 00:19:44.000
The parental-family-kid connection to what my work was all about in education.

00:19:44.000 --> 00:19:49.000
So, um, the book didn't get written then. Well, COVID comes along.

00:19:49.000 --> 00:19:53.000
And I said, okay, it's time to put this

00:19:53.000 --> 00:19:57.000
Pen to paper, and write this tribute to my father.

00:19:57.000 --> 00:20:05.000
So it was meant to be a small memoir that was a tribute to this man who raised me in such a wonderful environment with my mom.

00:20:05.000 --> 00:20:10.000
And out of that came… essentially, I selected 12 gifts.

00:20:10.000 --> 00:20:14.000
that I thought, non-material gifts.

00:20:14.000 --> 00:20:18.000
That were critical to making me a rich…

00:20:18.000 --> 00:20:20.000
individual in life.

00:20:20.000 --> 00:20:25.000
And those were things like time and presence, love and acceptance,

00:20:25.000 --> 00:20:27.000
Patience, humor…

00:20:27.000 --> 00:20:30.000
um, empathy, ethics, integrity,

00:20:30.000 --> 00:20:33.000
Um, sacrifice, things like that.

00:20:33.000 --> 00:20:37.000
So I set the book up so that each chapter

00:20:37.000 --> 00:20:39.000
is one gift.

00:20:39.000 --> 00:20:41.000
described. And the gift…

00:20:41.000 --> 00:20:46.000
The power of that gift is explained in the first one or two paragraphs.

00:20:46.000 --> 00:20:51.000
And then I list my reflections, some stories.

00:20:51.000 --> 00:20:54.000
And some examples of how my father

00:20:54.000 --> 00:20:58.000
gave that gift to us, whether it was by modeling it, or

00:20:58.000 --> 00:21:01.000
talking about it or showing it.

00:21:01.000 --> 00:21:07.000
And then the third section are a bunch of tools or suggestions that parents

00:21:07.000 --> 00:21:12.000
And educators, and anyone who's mentoring a child, social workers, nurses.

00:21:12.000 --> 00:21:21.000
Um, things that they can do to give these gifts to the children in front of them. I'm sure a lot of them are things parents already do.

00:21:21.000 --> 00:21:25.000
And care providers already do.

00:21:25.000 --> 00:21:28.000
But the people who have read the book have said,

00:21:28.000 --> 00:21:33.000
It just tweaked, kind of, my thinking about stuff, or it gave me some…

00:21:33.000 --> 00:21:39.000
extensions of what I do with my kids. I had one gentleman… one friend tell me,

00:21:39.000 --> 00:21:47.000
thanked me. He said, thank you for letting me know what I've done correctly as a parent, but also giving me suggestions on how I can do things better.

00:21:47.000 --> 00:21:54.000
So, that's how the book is set up, and there's one section of don'ts, don't do these things, because

00:21:54.000 --> 00:21:56.000
They destroy the relationship.

00:21:56.000 --> 00:21:58.000
And so, um…

00:21:58.000 --> 00:22:02.000
That's kind of how the book came out. Now, the reason…

00:22:02.000 --> 00:22:04.000
The book is called Coffee and Wisdom.

00:22:04.000 --> 00:22:07.000
is because from the time I was a…

00:22:07.000 --> 00:22:11.000
Elementary school student, that's as far back as I can remember.

00:22:11.000 --> 00:22:14.000
My father would come and get me and say, Ro,

00:22:14.000 --> 00:22:20.000
Come in the kitchen, have… I may… you know, we've got some cookies, have a glass of milk, let's talk.

00:22:20.000 --> 00:22:22.000
And that was in the evening.

00:22:22.000 --> 00:22:23.000
Wow.

00:22:23.000 --> 00:22:26.000
Every night. Every. Night.

00:22:26.000 --> 00:22:30.000
He would do that. That became our ritual. My mom was pretty

00:22:30.000 --> 00:22:35.000
taken up… her time was taken up with caretaking my grandparents, who lived underneath us.

00:22:35.000 --> 00:22:42.000
And that was the time of night that she would go down and make sure they ate well, they had their meds, and all of that kind of thing.

00:22:42.000 --> 00:22:43.000
So my dad and I had this time.

00:22:43.000 --> 00:22:44.000
Right.

00:22:44.000 --> 00:22:49.000
And he captured it. When I got to be 12, I insisted on coffee.

00:22:49.000 --> 00:22:52.000
So, from 12 on, I've been a coffee drinker.

00:22:52.000 --> 00:22:56.000
And we would sit over coffee and talk. And my father was

00:22:56.000 --> 00:23:01.000
an incredible communicator, self-taught.

00:23:01.000 --> 00:23:08.000
You know, he was a man who did not graduate from high school, you know, I've had a lot of parents say to me, well, I'm not smart enough,

00:23:08.000 --> 00:23:10.000
It has nothing to do with being smart.

00:23:10.000 --> 00:23:12.000
It has to do with being

00:23:12.000 --> 00:23:17.000
observant. It has to do with paying attention to life and seeing

00:23:17.000 --> 00:23:19.000
What seems to work and what seems to cause problems?

00:23:19.000 --> 00:23:21.000
My dad was a master at that.

00:23:21.000 --> 00:23:25.000
But he also would not let me get away

00:23:25.000 --> 00:23:31.000
With just answering the question, like most kids do, how was school today? Fine?

00:23:31.000 --> 00:23:37.000
That wasn't good enough for my father. He would sit there, and he would say,

00:23:37.000 --> 00:23:43.000
Why was it just fine? Why wasn't it a good day? What stopped it from being a good day?

00:23:43.000 --> 00:23:46.000
or if I said, oh, I had a great day, tell me what happened.

00:23:46.000 --> 00:23:50.000
And he would ask follow-up questions,

00:23:50.000 --> 00:23:55.000
he was the kind of communicator that would treat a conversation

00:23:55.000 --> 00:23:57.000
The way you would peel an onion.

00:23:57.000 --> 00:24:00.000
You would ask a question and then take a layer off, and ask,

00:24:00.000 --> 00:24:06.000
go down a little bit deeper into the discussion and take that off, and then go down a little bit deeper.

00:24:06.000 --> 00:24:12.000
So, his questions all involved the who, what, where, when, and why.

00:24:12.000 --> 00:24:17.000
of what was going on. So I was trained very early to be a critical thinker.

00:24:17.000 --> 00:24:19.000
That's awesome.

00:24:19.000 --> 00:24:21.000
You know, and critical thinking,

00:24:21.000 --> 00:24:28.000
is something that is so valuable for us as individuals, and the kind of thing you were talking about earlier.

00:24:28.000 --> 00:24:30.000
If we want to

00:24:30.000 --> 00:24:32.000
sit and listen to each other.

00:24:32.000 --> 00:24:36.000
And try to understand each other, and solve some difference…

00:24:36.000 --> 00:24:41.000
differences of opinions. We need to be able to critically think. We need to be able to say,

00:24:41.000 --> 00:24:45.000
Well, where's my bias in this? And my father would say that.

00:24:45.000 --> 00:24:48.000
Do you think you were biased? And when I was little, I'd say, what does that mean?

00:24:48.000 --> 00:24:53.000
And he'd say, well, did you go in with an idea in your head

00:24:53.000 --> 00:25:00.000
that you can't shake, and that even no matter what information you get. So, I was learning to be a critical thinker, and he would share

00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:05.000
His day, and do the same thing. And he would say to me, well, what do you want to ask me about that?

00:25:05.000 --> 00:25:11.000
So that he would make me think about, okay, let's have a full conversation about this.

00:25:11.000 --> 00:25:12.000
Now, interesting.

00:25:12.000 --> 00:25:16.000
So that's why… yeah, so that's why it's called Coffee and Wisdom, because we did that.

00:25:16.000 --> 00:25:23.000
That night that I had the conversation with him, which was the last conversation I ever had with my dad,

00:25:23.000 --> 00:25:30.000
He said to me before he told me he was apologizing, go get a cup of coffee, let's talk.

00:25:30.000 --> 00:25:38.000
Even when he was ill, he would call me long distance, um, because I lived about an hour away at that point I was married.

00:25:38.000 --> 00:25:47.000
And we would talk, and he would tell me what the doctor said to him, and what he was dealing with, and we would share our feelings, and we would always ask me about my day.

00:25:47.000 --> 00:25:51.000
So, I would say that one of the most imp…

00:25:51.000 --> 00:25:54.000
Important gifts my father gave me.

00:25:54.000 --> 00:25:57.000
was his time.

00:25:57.000 --> 00:26:01.000
You know, and consequently, ironically,

00:26:01.000 --> 00:26:05.000
Families today are overwhelmed with so many demands.

00:26:05.000 --> 00:26:10.000
Demands for more of their time, demands for their money, their information, their resources.

00:26:10.000 --> 00:26:14.000
demands for everything. And the reality is that

00:26:14.000 --> 00:26:16.000
You know, they…

00:26:16.000 --> 00:26:20.000
need to relax a little, and I tell parents,

00:26:20.000 --> 00:26:23.000
Parenting is a journey. It's not a destination.

00:26:23.000 --> 00:26:24.000
Dude.

00:26:24.000 --> 00:26:29.000
You know? So, like any trip you take,

00:26:29.000 --> 00:26:39.000
There's gonna be good things, and there's gonna be not-so-good things, there are going to be some roadblocks you can't… you can't get around, there will be roadblocks that you'll find your way around.

00:26:39.000 --> 00:26:44.000
And be excited, and maybe find something better on the end of that detour.

00:26:44.000 --> 00:26:46.000
So, um, I think…

00:26:46.000 --> 00:26:50.000
If parents can just relax a little bit, because

00:26:50.000 --> 00:26:53.000
they don't need their wallets.

00:26:53.000 --> 00:26:56.000
And we live in a hustle culture.

00:26:56.000 --> 00:26:57.000
Dude.

00:26:57.000 --> 00:27:00.000
And a lot of parents, particularly parents who don't feel they have enough time,

00:27:00.000 --> 00:27:03.000
think they can make it up to their kids.

00:27:03.000 --> 00:27:05.000
By giving them gifts.

00:27:05.000 --> 00:27:11.000
You know, giving them the newest iPhone, giving them a car when they get their driver's license.

00:27:11.000 --> 00:27:19.000
Um, and going, you know, giving them riding lessons, and…

00:27:19.000 --> 00:27:20.000
Right.

00:27:20.000 --> 00:27:21.000
You know, art lessons, and not that they shouldn't do that, but in place of

00:27:21.000 --> 00:27:22.000
Not as an escape.

00:27:22.000 --> 00:27:24.000
there presents ENCE.

00:27:24.000 --> 00:27:33.000
Which is so critical. So my dad gave me all that, and that's why you have the cover of the book, which is basically, uh, some cookies and a cup of coffee.

00:27:33.000 --> 00:27:39.000
And that was our reflection time. Originally, I was going to call the book Conversations Over Coffee,

00:27:39.000 --> 00:27:43.000
Because my father instilled a lot of his wisdom in those conversations.

00:27:43.000 --> 00:27:46.000
But that wasn't the only place.

00:27:46.000 --> 00:27:49.000
He also instilled conversations in his…

00:27:49.000 --> 00:27:56.000
active listening that he always engaged in. You know, I look at intentional parenting

00:27:56.000 --> 00:28:00.000
is like a stool with 3 prongs to sit on.

00:28:00.000 --> 00:28:03.000
The first one is to

00:28:03.000 --> 00:28:07.000
listen actively to your kids.

00:28:07.000 --> 00:28:13.000
From when they're little. You could be sitting there reading a book, but you should be listening to what they're saying, what they're doing.

00:28:13.000 --> 00:28:17.000
You need to understand each of your child's

00:28:17.000 --> 00:28:19.000
Likes, dislikes,

00:28:19.000 --> 00:28:27.000
fears, concerns, hopes, aspirations, as they get old, you know, as they get older, even when they little, I want to be a fireman daddy.

00:28:27.000 --> 00:28:31.000
Listen to that, because it's telling you something about the child.

00:28:31.000 --> 00:28:34.000
And no two children are alike, so you have to listen to each of them.

00:28:34.000 --> 00:28:36.000
And try to sort out, okay,

00:28:36.000 --> 00:28:41.000
And it sounds mind-boggling, but it really isn't. It really isn't. You can sit there and just say, oh, I didn't…

00:28:41.000 --> 00:28:45.000
You know, that's interesting, and have a conversation later.

00:28:45.000 --> 00:28:48.000
listening actively also means

00:28:48.000 --> 00:28:52.000
When your child is talking to you, you're not looking at your phone.

00:28:52.000 --> 00:28:56.000
You're not reading a book. You're not saying, oh, nice.

00:28:56.000 --> 00:29:01.000
You're making eye contact with them, and if they're little, you're on the floor with them.

00:29:01.000 --> 00:29:03.000
You know, when I was a school principal,

00:29:03.000 --> 00:29:09.000
I went from high school, junior high, to elementary, which almost killed me, because I spent the first…

00:29:09.000 --> 00:29:21.000
First month, um, on the, you know, different body positions, sitting on the floor a lot with the kids.

00:29:21.000 --> 00:29:22.000
Wow.

00:29:22.000 --> 00:29:24.000
And, boy, I had to go to a chiropractors, my back was killing me because I wasn't going to just stand there and look over kids, you know?

00:29:24.000 --> 00:29:26.000
So, um…

00:29:26.000 --> 00:29:30.000
Eye contact is critical, listening, reflecting back what you hear,

00:29:30.000 --> 00:29:31.000
And not in a…

00:29:31.000 --> 00:29:36.000
I like that right there, the reflecting back, and I think you mentioned that who, what, when, where, why, and how earlier.

00:29:36.000 --> 00:29:37.000
Yeah.

00:29:37.000 --> 00:29:38.000
And asking those questions, right? As they're talking, as you're listening?

00:29:38.000 --> 00:29:46.000
Right, and then listening for the answer, not telling them what they should be saying, but really listening, and then following them up with, well,

00:29:46.000 --> 00:29:52.000
That's very interesting. And not correcting them, but just reflecting back what you hear.

00:29:52.000 --> 00:30:01.000
Um, because being totally judgmental is tough. My father was not a very judgmental person at all.

00:30:01.000 --> 00:30:04.000
And he would listen very actively, and he had

00:30:04.000 --> 00:30:09.000
My sister and I grew up 13 and a half years apart.

00:30:09.000 --> 00:30:11.000
I actually started

00:30:11.000 --> 00:30:14.000
college the day she started kindergarten.

00:30:14.000 --> 00:30:18.000
So, we grew up in two different houses, and people have said, was your father the same with her?

00:30:18.000 --> 00:30:22.000
He was. He did the same thing. He, she had coffee with him.

00:30:22.000 --> 00:30:28.000
Um, they talked a lot of sports, because she loves sports. I didn't. I would talk a little bit about football with him,

00:30:28.000 --> 00:30:32.000
She talked a lot about baseball with them, and football with him.

00:30:32.000 --> 00:30:38.000
Um, in politics, and I talk politics. My dad was really into talking about politics.

00:30:38.000 --> 00:30:40.000
But she did have the same

00:30:40.000 --> 00:30:44.000
Essentially the same dad, even though it was years later.

00:30:44.000 --> 00:30:49.000
Now, the second thing parents need to do, the second pillar,

00:30:49.000 --> 00:30:51.000
is to be very observant.

00:30:51.000 --> 00:30:55.000
And really watch your kids.

00:30:55.000 --> 00:31:00.000
And pay attention, again, to what… what are they drawn to.

00:31:00.000 --> 00:31:05.000
What are they afraid of? What do they seem to react harshly to?

00:31:05.000 --> 00:31:10.000
You know, I have families I've worked with as a… as a Director of Special Ed and a special educator.

00:31:10.000 --> 00:31:12.000
who, um…

00:31:12.000 --> 00:31:16.000
started to pay attention to their kids and understand that.

00:31:16.000 --> 00:31:19.000
You didn't have to be on the autism spectrum.

00:31:19.000 --> 00:31:22.000
to have a problem tolerating sound.

00:31:22.000 --> 00:31:26.000
And they started to pick up on, oh,

00:31:26.000 --> 00:31:32.000
Our daughter really is not good when it's really noisy in the house. Have you noticed?

00:31:32.000 --> 00:31:37.000
You know, to just pay attention to that, because they are so very differently.

00:31:37.000 --> 00:31:39.000
And, you know, if you don't,

00:31:39.000 --> 00:31:46.000
Observe your kids and find out where they're struggling, and you don't listen to them when they come to you, even when a child comes to you and says,

00:31:46.000 --> 00:31:49.000
You know, mommy, mommy, look at this picture I just…

00:31:49.000 --> 00:31:53.000
I just drew. Isn't it pretty?

00:31:53.000 --> 00:31:58.000
And you may… you need to say, yeah, that's… why did you choose that color? Or, that's great.

00:31:58.000 --> 00:32:00.000
Because if you don't do that,

00:32:00.000 --> 00:32:06.000
When they're 13, 14, and 15, and their boyfriends are doing drugs, or their friends are having sex,

00:32:06.000 --> 00:32:09.000
And they want to talk to you, they're not going to come to you.

00:32:09.000 --> 00:32:10.000
They'll go to the people they feel confident enough

00:32:10.000 --> 00:32:11.000
Right.

00:32:11.000 --> 00:32:13.000
that will listen to them.

00:32:13.000 --> 00:32:14.000
So you want to…

00:32:14.000 --> 00:32:19.000
And sometimes that listening is not necessarily the people that are bringing the best value to them.

00:32:19.000 --> 00:32:20.000
too, right?

00:32:20.000 --> 00:32:29.000
Absolutely. Absolutely. And, you know, the whole point is you want your core values, whatever they are in your family, what your core values are,

00:32:29.000 --> 00:32:32.000
to be passed on to your kids.

00:32:32.000 --> 00:32:39.000
So, observing and listening. The third rung is the hardest one, I think, as a parent, because we're human.

00:32:39.000 --> 00:32:44.000
And we make mistakes, but it's to model carefully.

00:32:44.000 --> 00:32:48.000
what you want your kids to see and be like.

00:32:48.000 --> 00:32:51.000
If your modeling aggressive,

00:32:51.000 --> 00:32:57.000
harsh, angry language to people in front of them and on the phone.

00:32:57.000 --> 00:33:01.000
They're gonna think, that's okay, I can do that, I'll be that.

00:33:01.000 --> 00:33:02.000
But if you're modeling,

00:33:02.000 --> 00:33:03.000
It's a comfort level, right?

00:33:03.000 --> 00:33:05.000
Right. If you're modeling

00:33:05.000 --> 00:33:12.000
Um, yeah, because then it becomes the norm. Oh, it's normal to raise my voice. You know, we're Italian, we raise our voices.

00:33:12.000 --> 00:33:22.000
Maybe that's not… and I'm Italian, so I can say that… um, and we do raise our voices, and we get very visual, and there are kids who can't handle all of this

00:33:22.000 --> 00:33:26.000
movement of… of hands and stuff.

00:33:26.000 --> 00:33:34.000
Um, so we have to be careful, because the kids are watching, and they're watching when they're little. You know, the term, out of the mouth of babes didn't come from nowhere.

00:33:34.000 --> 00:33:38.000
It was from children really paying attention.

00:33:38.000 --> 00:33:40.000
And you're their focal point when they're little.

00:33:40.000 --> 00:33:49.000
And you're their focal point when they get older, and they're comparing you with everybody, every other adult they see, and your aunts and uncles, or whoever's in the family.

00:33:49.000 --> 00:33:51.000
So, those three

00:33:51.000 --> 00:33:54.000
pillars of intentional parenting.

00:33:54.000 --> 00:33:57.000
will go a long, long way

00:33:57.000 --> 00:34:00.000
towards instilling in your kids

00:34:00.000 --> 00:34:07.000
Um, it's a base point for you to instill in your kids the values and the character you want them to become.

00:34:07.000 --> 00:34:13.000
So, I would say to parents, um, that's the starting point.

00:34:13.000 --> 00:34:15.000
And then once you do that,

00:34:15.000 --> 00:34:23.000
Make sure that you give them the gifts I talk about, and why each of one… each of them is a powerhouse in its own.

00:34:23.000 --> 00:34:28.000
You know, and why it really pushes kids to be rich.

00:34:28.000 --> 00:34:31.000
Which I… Rich, to me, is being…

00:34:31.000 --> 00:34:36.000
I got a lot of acronyms built around that, but basically resilient.

00:34:36.000 --> 00:34:38.000
An independent and confident.

00:34:38.000 --> 00:34:39.000
And happy.

00:34:39.000 --> 00:34:43.000
I like that, and Rosemary, some of the things that you're talking about,

00:34:43.000 --> 00:34:46.000
is knowledge, because…

00:34:46.000 --> 00:34:50.000
Money is great, but the more knowledge you have,

00:34:50.000 --> 00:34:52.000
Is it going to be easier for all of us?

00:34:52.000 --> 00:34:54.000
Especially raising our children,

00:34:54.000 --> 00:34:58.000
The more intelligent they are, the easier it is for them to make.

00:34:58.000 --> 00:34:59.000
a better income, right?

00:34:59.000 --> 00:35:02.000
Right. And we're talking about emotional intelligence here.

00:35:02.000 --> 00:35:06.000
Because there are a lot of incredibly intelligent people who have very high IQs,

00:35:06.000 --> 00:35:08.000
True.

00:35:08.000 --> 00:35:11.000
who are not terribly connected.

00:35:11.000 --> 00:35:15.000
to many people, and are not terribly happy.

00:35:15.000 --> 00:35:20.000
Um, because they're… they've got wealth, and see,

00:35:20.000 --> 00:35:23.000
Part of this came out of two things.

00:35:23.000 --> 00:35:29.000
I grew up with a family that placed high value on character building.

00:35:29.000 --> 00:35:33.000
They really did. And we didn't have a lot of money.

00:35:33.000 --> 00:35:39.000
So, we didn't have the resources to sort of distract us from that focus.

00:35:39.000 --> 00:35:43.000
Okay? So, it was important…

00:35:43.000 --> 00:35:48.000
Um, for me to pay attention to that. I was in school, I was in a small town,

00:35:48.000 --> 00:35:51.000
The town was kind of dichotomous. We had a lake,

00:35:51.000 --> 00:35:55.000
And we had the city. And the kids who grew up

00:35:55.000 --> 00:36:00.000
along the lake, like so many communities, had very large houses,

00:36:00.000 --> 00:36:03.000
Had very brand new, expensive cars,

00:36:03.000 --> 00:36:07.000
Their parents owned a lot of the big businesses in the city.

00:36:07.000 --> 00:36:14.000
And then we had the lake crowd, which I was… I mean, the city crowd, which I was part of, that was basically middle class, lower middle class,

00:36:14.000 --> 00:36:19.000
Laborers, workers, small business owners like my dad, who owned a muffler business.

00:36:19.000 --> 00:36:23.000
Um, in a gas station business over the years.

00:36:23.000 --> 00:36:26.000
And what I started to see…

00:36:26.000 --> 00:36:32.000
is that my friends who were in my classes from the lake that had a lot of money,

00:36:32.000 --> 00:36:35.000
We're no happier than

00:36:35.000 --> 00:36:41.000
My friends who were from the city that didn't have very much of anything.

00:36:41.000 --> 00:36:47.000
There wasn't a big difference, and as I grew older, I paid attention to that in my career.

00:36:47.000 --> 00:36:50.000
working with families and working with, um…

00:36:50.000 --> 00:36:53.000
especially working with a lot of distressed families because of

00:36:53.000 --> 00:36:57.000
you know, kids with disabilities, kids with behavior problems.

00:36:57.000 --> 00:37:02.000
Um, money… significant money issues.

00:37:02.000 --> 00:37:05.000
Um, and feeling less than because they couldn't provide.

00:37:05.000 --> 00:37:10.000
for their kids. I wish I had a dime for every parent who said to me,

00:37:10.000 --> 00:37:15.000
Well, I can't give my kids what they need because we don't have enough money.

00:37:15.000 --> 00:37:18.000
And I said, oh, but everything your kids need…

00:37:18.000 --> 00:37:20.000
You can put your wallet away.

00:37:20.000 --> 00:37:26.000
And they would, like, what do you mean? And I would talk to them, and I would get to know their kids sometimes, and I would say,

00:37:26.000 --> 00:37:33.000
Here's what your kid needs. I can tell you, as his principal, or as his teacher. I can tell you this is what your child needs.

00:37:33.000 --> 00:37:41.000
So, it's important to kind of give these non-material gifts that establish within your own

00:37:41.000 --> 00:37:44.000
sphere, your own family, what your core values are.

00:37:44.000 --> 00:37:47.000
And resilience is key.

00:37:47.000 --> 00:37:49.000
to everybody's happiness.

00:37:49.000 --> 00:37:50.000
Especially in today's world.

00:37:50.000 --> 00:37:55.000
And… and it sounds like the information that you're talking about

00:37:55.000 --> 00:37:58.000
is investing into their tomorrow.

00:37:58.000 --> 00:37:59.000
Correct.

00:37:59.000 --> 00:38:00.000
What you're teaching them

00:38:00.000 --> 00:38:01.000
And those answers that they're…

00:38:01.000 --> 00:38:02.000
Correct.

00:38:02.000 --> 00:38:06.000
building from is going to strengthen their tomorrow. They'll have that…

00:38:06.000 --> 00:38:09.000
more solid foundation.

00:38:09.000 --> 00:38:10.000
To walk on, right?

00:38:10.000 --> 00:38:13.000
Correct. Right. And what I try to tell parents is,

00:38:13.000 --> 00:38:15.000
The legacy

00:38:15.000 --> 00:38:18.000
you need to leave them is not about money.

00:38:18.000 --> 00:38:25.000
It's about leaving a legacy of character that is going to serve them well the rest of their lives.

00:38:25.000 --> 00:38:27.000
They can blow through money in a month.

00:38:27.000 --> 00:38:30.000
You know, if they don't… if they're not…

00:38:30.000 --> 00:38:33.000
intuitive enough to understand

00:38:33.000 --> 00:38:38.000
what they need to do with it, but they can't blow through a lifetime of being

00:38:38.000 --> 00:38:41.000
taught how to be trusting.

00:38:41.000 --> 00:38:45.000
how to be patient, how to be respectful.

00:38:45.000 --> 00:38:51.000
You know? So, the greatest inheritance you can give your children is who they become.

00:38:51.000 --> 00:38:54.000
You know, when people see your kids,

00:38:54.000 --> 00:38:58.000
I'll, you know, a lot of times they'll say, oh, it's their kids.

00:38:58.000 --> 00:39:00.000
Well, what do they tell… what do…

00:39:00.000 --> 00:39:03.000
What do pet owners learn?

00:39:03.000 --> 00:39:07.000
That when their dog is misbehaving and their dog isn't doing things, it's really…

00:39:07.000 --> 00:39:11.000
What do the trainers do? They train the owners.

00:39:11.000 --> 00:39:13.000
They train the owners what to do.

00:39:13.000 --> 00:39:20.000
And it's the same thing, and I'm not saying you can't have a kid that gets in with the wrong crowd and just totally dismisses you, because that happens.

00:39:20.000 --> 00:39:22.000
But the reality is,

00:39:22.000 --> 00:39:24.000
If you use

00:39:24.000 --> 00:39:26.000
what I'm talking about.

00:39:26.000 --> 00:39:31.000
I know how it worked for me, and I saw how it worked for my friends,

00:39:31.000 --> 00:39:34.000
who became engaged with my dad.

00:39:34.000 --> 00:39:37.000
You know, in the 1980s,

00:39:37.000 --> 00:39:42.000
There was a research study done on resiliency.

00:39:42.000 --> 00:39:48.000
And the researchers took… and I forget whether it was Ohio University or Harvard, it was one of the big colleges.

00:39:48.000 --> 00:39:53.000
They took one… it was a decade-long study. They took one

00:39:53.000 --> 00:39:58.000
hundred adults who had

00:39:58.000 --> 00:40:00.000
quote-unquote, made it.

00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:04.000
Now, what does that mean?

00:40:04.000 --> 00:40:11.000
Their definition of having made it was… they didn't end up in jail, they didn't end up on drugs,

00:40:11.000 --> 00:40:18.000
They were able to get a job, hold a job, be independent, take care of themselves, and maybe a family.

00:40:18.000 --> 00:40:26.000
Some of them went to college, some of them became janitors. It didn't matter. They were independent, happy, successful individuals.

00:40:26.000 --> 00:40:32.000
Yet, all 100 of them.

00:40:32.000 --> 00:40:35.000
had come from

00:40:35.000 --> 00:40:40.000
Terrible childhoods and situations. Drug abuse, sexual abuse, abandonment.

00:40:40.000 --> 00:40:43.000
Um, you know,

00:40:43.000 --> 00:40:46.000
uh, starvation, not having had their

00:40:46.000 --> 00:40:50.000
basic biological needs met, medical problems.

00:40:50.000 --> 00:40:52.000
All of that, yet…

00:40:52.000 --> 00:40:59.000
They made it, and others who are in that strand did not. So, they said, well,

00:40:59.000 --> 00:41:02.000
Let's do a root cause analysis.

00:41:02.000 --> 00:41:06.000
Let's figure out what is the basic reason

00:41:06.000 --> 00:41:15.000
Why each of these individuals made it, and is there any strand or commonality across the group?

00:41:15.000 --> 00:41:19.000
And they interviewed every single one of them at length.

00:41:19.000 --> 00:41:24.000
And they found that in all 100 cases,

00:41:24.000 --> 00:41:27.000
Each person, when asked,

00:41:27.000 --> 00:41:32.000
How did you make it out of that crap environment you lived in? How did you make it out of that trauma?

00:41:32.000 --> 00:41:35.000
How did you… how did you surpass that?

00:41:35.000 --> 00:41:38.000
Every single one of them said,

00:41:38.000 --> 00:41:45.000
Well, I had someone who let me know that I was a good person,

00:41:45.000 --> 00:41:50.000
that I could make my life into whatever I wanted it to be.

00:41:50.000 --> 00:41:54.000
I could do what I wanted to do.

00:41:54.000 --> 00:42:00.000
Every one of them had at least one significant adult who convinced them

00:42:00.000 --> 00:42:02.000
that their past was their past.

00:42:02.000 --> 00:42:05.000
And they didn't have to become their past.

00:42:05.000 --> 00:42:07.000
They could supersede it.

00:42:07.000 --> 00:42:08.000
The interesting…

00:42:08.000 --> 00:42:13.000
And that's so true, and it's very interesting, and as she said that it convinced them

00:42:13.000 --> 00:42:16.000
Sometimes that convincing is very minor.

00:42:16.000 --> 00:42:17.000
Right.

00:42:17.000 --> 00:42:19.000
Convincing doesn't mean that you're…

00:42:19.000 --> 00:42:22.000
Spending hours and days and weeks convincing them.

00:42:22.000 --> 00:42:25.000
It's just giving them that value.

00:42:25.000 --> 00:42:26.000
Correct. Cool.

00:42:26.000 --> 00:42:28.000
Where they see the value in doing that, or continuing that,

00:42:28.000 --> 00:42:29.000
Absolutely.

00:42:29.000 --> 00:42:31.000
to go forward, right?

00:42:31.000 --> 00:42:32.000
Right.

00:42:32.000 --> 00:42:35.000
It… and what I'm hearing you say, it appears…

00:42:35.000 --> 00:42:37.000
And one of the things I like about what you're saying…

00:42:37.000 --> 00:42:39.000
is that honesty

00:42:39.000 --> 00:42:43.000
and humor, patience, and gratitude,

00:42:43.000 --> 00:42:47.000
are the pillars, the pillars to your approach. That's strength.

00:42:47.000 --> 00:42:51.000
And how each of these have specific, again, as I mentioned,

00:42:51.000 --> 00:42:53.000
values proven.

00:42:53.000 --> 00:42:59.000
to themselves, that they're… they're the most powerful thing in shaping

00:42:59.000 --> 00:43:00.000
Right.

00:43:00.000 --> 00:43:02.000
A strong, kind, and confident…

00:43:02.000 --> 00:43:04.000
But we don't want to say just child.

00:43:04.000 --> 00:43:08.000
But a person.

00:43:08.000 --> 00:43:09.000
Even adults.

00:43:09.000 --> 00:43:12.000
Even adults. And the interesting thing about this… the interesting thing about the study is,

00:43:12.000 --> 00:43:17.000
Of the 100 who all had mentors, or a mentor,

00:43:17.000 --> 00:43:22.000
87 of them reported that it was a teacher.

00:43:22.000 --> 00:43:27.000
So, I tell my teachers, and I've continued to tell my teachers,

00:43:27.000 --> 00:43:30.000
You have incredible…

00:43:30.000 --> 00:43:34.000
influence and power over every child you teach.

00:43:34.000 --> 00:43:38.000
You have the power to make them or break them.

00:43:38.000 --> 00:43:43.000
So, be responsible, take that responsibility to heart,

00:43:43.000 --> 00:43:46.000
And be very careful to always

00:43:46.000 --> 00:43:48.000
give a child hope,

00:43:48.000 --> 00:43:55.000
And look for what… how you can instill some future in them that makes them believe

00:43:55.000 --> 00:43:58.000
They can do something more than what they're doing.

00:43:58.000 --> 00:44:02.000
And I like what you're saying, because you mentioned to make or break,

00:44:02.000 --> 00:44:07.000
But each of these situations is not because of forcefulness,

00:44:07.000 --> 00:44:10.000
This is because of that sharing that I'm hearing you talk about.

00:44:10.000 --> 00:44:11.000
Absolutely.

00:44:11.000 --> 00:44:13.000
Giving them the chance to…

00:44:13.000 --> 00:44:20.000
Speak up. Then you have that, as you mentioned, that active listening.

00:44:20.000 --> 00:44:22.000
Sometimes even questioning

00:44:22.000 --> 00:44:24.000
why they feel that way, good or bad.

00:44:24.000 --> 00:44:25.000
You might want to say… want to make a lot?

00:44:25.000 --> 00:44:27.000
Right, no judgment on it, just…

00:44:27.000 --> 00:44:30.000
Why do you feel that way? Hen… hen…

00:44:30.000 --> 00:44:33.000
How could we look at this differently?

00:44:33.000 --> 00:44:36.000
You know, my dad, one of the chapters is on perspective.

00:44:36.000 --> 00:44:44.000
And my father… it's on perspective and empathy, actually, and we certainly need a whole lot more of that in the world today.

00:44:44.000 --> 00:44:45.000
Yes.

00:44:45.000 --> 00:44:51.000
Um, because people are being so judgmental and so divisive and so we, they, and non-inclusive.

00:44:51.000 --> 00:44:53.000
You know, my whole career has been including

00:44:53.000 --> 00:44:59.000
people into processes, environments where they're not wanted.

00:44:59.000 --> 00:45:01.000
You know, disabled kids.

00:45:01.000 --> 00:45:08.000
Disabled kids were never invited into schools. They had to have separate classrooms. They had to have separate wings of the school.

00:45:08.000 --> 00:45:11.000
So, my whole career was inclusion.

00:45:11.000 --> 00:45:14.000
Getting these kids in. Um…

00:45:14.000 --> 00:45:17.000
So, my father would talk about

00:45:17.000 --> 00:45:20.000
you know, how did I learn from him? Like I said.

00:45:20.000 --> 00:45:25.000
I learned from him by our conversations, I learned from him by his modeling of things,

00:45:25.000 --> 00:45:30.000
And by his reflecting back, we would watch television.

00:45:30.000 --> 00:45:34.000
And he would, um, he would say,

00:45:34.000 --> 00:45:40.000
That was an interesting show. You know, we might, uh, we might be watching Bringing Up Father or something.

00:45:40.000 --> 00:45:46.000
And he'd say, why do you think his son said that to him?

00:45:46.000 --> 00:45:47.000
How do you think he felt when…

00:45:47.000 --> 00:45:51.000
When his kids said that to him. And we would, we would talk about it.

00:45:51.000 --> 00:45:56.000
So my father would talk about perspective, and he would say, you know, Rosemary,

00:45:56.000 --> 00:45:58.000
We can say

00:45:58.000 --> 00:46:07.000
we can walk in other people's shoes. You need to walk in other people's shoes. And he said… and for the most part, we can sympathize with them and get an idea,

00:46:07.000 --> 00:46:09.000
Even if you and I had had the same surgery,

00:46:09.000 --> 00:46:13.000
Oh, yeah, I know what you're going… no you don't know what you're… it's a different journey.

00:46:13.000 --> 00:46:17.000
It's not exactly the same. So he would say,

00:46:17.000 --> 00:46:23.000
The problem is, we don't know what the baggage is that came

00:46:23.000 --> 00:46:26.000
with them to this point.

00:46:26.000 --> 00:46:35.000
And if we did, it might drastically alter our perspective and our empathy towards what they… how they are behaving or what they're doing.

00:46:35.000 --> 00:46:40.000
And I'll give you an example. I came home from school one day in high school.

00:46:40.000 --> 00:46:44.000
very distressed, because my high school chemistry teacher

00:46:44.000 --> 00:46:51.000
Walked into… and I… we… we didn't… I don't know whether it was a subject, it was chemistry, I wasn't a math-science person, but…

00:46:51.000 --> 00:46:58.000
He just… he… he rubbed me the wrong way, he was little. We used to say he had Napoleon Complex, you know, because he was gruff.

00:46:58.000 --> 00:47:02.000
And all business-like. Well, he walked in the classroom one day,

00:47:02.000 --> 00:47:10.000
And everybody was… we were always quiet, because he was a tyrant when we weren't. We were very quiet, and he walked in.

00:47:10.000 --> 00:47:11.000
And he took the garbage can.

00:47:11.000 --> 00:47:14.000
that he was walking towards, and he…

00:47:14.000 --> 00:47:16.000
kicked it across the room.

00:47:16.000 --> 00:47:18.000
Didn't go through the window, it almost did.

00:47:18.000 --> 00:47:27.000
But it startled all of us. And I went home that night, and I said to my father, I wish I could just get out of his class. He makes me crazy.

00:47:27.000 --> 00:47:32.000
You know, why would you start a class that way? My father said, well,

00:47:32.000 --> 00:47:38.000
Did he seem any different than he was any other day? And I said, well, he was obviously upset.

00:47:38.000 --> 00:47:43.000
more upset, and he goes, what was he upset about? And I said, well, I don't know, why would I know?

00:47:43.000 --> 00:47:49.000
My father said, well, let's make up some scenarios. Let's see what you would think if it was something different.

00:47:49.000 --> 00:47:53.000
He said, you know, if we all had ticker tapes that went across our forehead,

00:47:53.000 --> 00:47:59.000
that gave the people that were looking at us the background of what we just came from,

00:47:59.000 --> 00:48:05.000
It might change how we think about the situation, might change how we think about them.

00:48:05.000 --> 00:48:08.000
He said, what if… let's suppose…

00:48:08.000 --> 00:48:12.000
Suppose just before he walked into that room, he got a phone call.

00:48:12.000 --> 00:48:19.000
from his wife, who was upset, and said, I just got a call from the doctor, I have cancer.

00:48:19.000 --> 00:48:22.000
And he had to go to that class.

00:48:22.000 --> 00:48:26.000
Would you feel the same way? And I said, no, of course not.

00:48:26.000 --> 00:48:28.000
Of course not. He said, okay.

00:48:28.000 --> 00:48:38.000
I want you to think about that whenever you're faced with a situation that stresses you or distresses you because of someone's behavior.

00:48:38.000 --> 00:48:41.000
Take a step back and say, hmm…

00:48:41.000 --> 00:48:44.000
That's the approach I used working with behavioral…

00:48:44.000 --> 00:48:46.000
problems in children.

00:48:46.000 --> 00:48:53.000
Okay? When I would deal with parents who were struggling because they might have had one or more kids that were really

00:48:53.000 --> 00:48:55.000
upending the family.

00:48:55.000 --> 00:48:58.000
And I would say, okay.

00:48:58.000 --> 00:49:01.000
Let's take apart what's going on with the child.

00:49:01.000 --> 00:49:05.000
And there is a wonderful system and process we use

00:49:05.000 --> 00:49:08.000
to get at the root cause of behavior.

00:49:08.000 --> 00:49:14.000
Okay? What are the triggers? What triggers this kid? You know? And then you can work to fix it.

00:49:14.000 --> 00:49:20.000
So you're working at connection with the kid, not correction at that point.

00:49:20.000 --> 00:49:22.000
Because if a kid is really distressed about something,

00:49:22.000 --> 00:49:29.000
He's not going to step back and say, oh, well, I shouldn't yell or raise my voice. They're just going to do it. It's a…

00:49:29.000 --> 00:49:33.000
It's a call-out. We think nothing of a baby that cries all night.

00:49:33.000 --> 00:49:35.000
And we find out they have colic, right?

00:49:35.000 --> 00:49:39.000
It's the same with kids. It's like, why are they seeking out

00:49:39.000 --> 00:49:45.000
the internet so much? Why are they sneaking out of the house at night? What is causing that?

00:49:45.000 --> 00:49:51.000
And what I found out, I went to a conference one time, a psychological conference,

00:49:51.000 --> 00:49:54.000
And there was one psychologist speaking, and he was

00:49:54.000 --> 00:49:59.000
doing a whole thing on basic behavioral intervention strategies.

00:49:59.000 --> 00:50:03.000
And he was talking to teachers. We were all teachers, and he said, look,

00:50:03.000 --> 00:50:14.000
He said, there's really two reasons, in my opinion, why kids misbehave, or why they act inappropriately, or why they go off the rails, or whatever you want to call their behavior.

00:50:14.000 --> 00:50:20.000
There's really two reasons. He said kids who are insecure, don't feel safe,

00:50:20.000 --> 00:50:25.000
Or don't feel they have any control over anything are going to act out.

00:50:25.000 --> 00:50:28.000
So these are the kids who, you know,

00:50:28.000 --> 00:50:36.000
Parents are divorced, and they have… the parents are not on the same page and have not worked out who's going to be where, so they don't know if they're going to mommy's, they don't know if they're going to Daddy's,

00:50:36.000 --> 00:50:38.000
I had a judge one time.

00:50:38.000 --> 00:50:41.000
Split custody by the day.

00:50:41.000 --> 00:50:43.000
for a 6-year-old.

00:50:43.000 --> 00:50:47.000
After a month, he was out of his mind crazy in school.

00:50:47.000 --> 00:50:52.000
Because he never knew where my going, and he knew if he went with Dad, he might not get food.

00:50:52.000 --> 00:51:05.000
And if he went home to mom, he would eat. So he had no control over anything. So he said, so, what you do with kids, always, is you give them choice. So they have some control over their lives, because they don't feel like they have any anywhere.

00:51:05.000 --> 00:51:08.000
So you in the classroom, give them choices.

00:51:08.000 --> 00:51:12.000
And one of the things he said is, let me tell you a little trick, and it works.

00:51:12.000 --> 00:51:14.000
Beautifully.

00:51:14.000 --> 00:51:16.000
Give them two choices.

00:51:16.000 --> 00:51:19.000
one you want, and one they don't.

00:51:19.000 --> 00:51:23.000
you end up with them doing what they need to do.

00:51:23.000 --> 00:51:25.000
Almost all of the time.

00:51:25.000 --> 00:51:29.000
So, same thing for teachers in the classroom.

00:51:29.000 --> 00:51:35.000
You've got a kid who cannot spell, and we know spelling is one of those things your brain either can spell or your brain can't spell.

00:51:35.000 --> 00:51:39.000
My husband has a doctorate, he's a chemist, he can't spell for…

00:51:39.000 --> 00:51:42.000
anything. He's constantly asking me how to spell simple words.

00:51:42.000 --> 00:51:47.000
So, it's one of those things. So, if you have a kid like that,

00:51:47.000 --> 00:51:53.000
And you're doing a spelling bee, and you're making everybody stand up in front of the room and spell…

00:51:53.000 --> 00:51:57.000
the vocabulary words, that kid

00:51:57.000 --> 00:51:58.000
Huge money.

00:51:58.000 --> 00:51:59.000
Would rather act out and end up getting thrown out of the classroom, right? So,

00:51:59.000 --> 00:52:00.000
That's true.

00:52:00.000 --> 00:52:02.000
Again, it's kind of…

00:52:02.000 --> 00:52:06.000
Pay attention, give them choice,

00:52:06.000 --> 00:52:14.000
And I… a lot of my career in my consulting days, between 2003, when I formally retired,

00:52:14.000 --> 00:52:16.000
And COVID, when I stopped consulting,

00:52:16.000 --> 00:52:19.000
Um, in-person consulting.

00:52:19.000 --> 00:52:22.000
A lot of it was, okay, let's…

00:52:22.000 --> 00:52:27.000
Teach parents how to do this, how to give their kids choices, and teachers…

00:52:27.000 --> 00:52:28.000
That is so true.

00:52:28.000 --> 00:52:33.000
You need to provide 2 or 3 different ways for them to show you they know the answers.

00:52:33.000 --> 00:52:34.000
You know.

00:52:34.000 --> 00:52:39.000
Okay, we only have about 6 more minutes left, so we… this has been exciting. I know there's so many interesting things.

00:52:39.000 --> 00:52:42.000
Because the things you're talking about are the things we all need to know.

00:52:42.000 --> 00:52:46.000
And like we talked about mothers and fathers, and I work with both parents, and the best parent is both parents in the process.

00:52:46.000 --> 00:52:47.000
Absolutely.

00:52:47.000 --> 00:52:53.000
But sometimes, even the best parents sometimes don't know what to do.

00:52:53.000 --> 00:52:56.000
And that's why programs like yours and mine

00:52:56.000 --> 00:52:57.000
reaching out to helping people pick back up.

00:52:57.000 --> 00:52:59.000
Right?

00:52:59.000 --> 00:53:05.000
Because there's some things that happen not so good at the mother's house, sometimes things happen not so good at the father's house.

00:53:05.000 --> 00:53:06.000
Right.

00:53:06.000 --> 00:53:08.000
So, mother, father, man, woman, male, female.

00:53:08.000 --> 00:53:11.000
It's a process of a all-knowing and learning,

00:53:11.000 --> 00:53:12.000
Right.

00:53:12.000 --> 00:53:18.000
Before we're in that situation, because I look back now, I think I knew I should…

00:53:18.000 --> 00:53:21.000
have done that I didn't do.

00:53:21.000 --> 00:53:24.000
And sometimes it was other things coming about.

00:53:24.000 --> 00:53:25.000
Right.

00:53:25.000 --> 00:53:26.000
that prevent me from doing them,

00:53:26.000 --> 00:53:29.000
But it was all me, and things I should have known.

00:53:29.000 --> 00:53:32.000
So just quickly, as our last point,

00:53:32.000 --> 00:53:34.000
If listeners could take just one concept,

00:53:34.000 --> 00:53:40.000
One concept from your book, things you're talking about today, means they could share that with their own circle.

00:53:40.000 --> 00:53:42.000
Starting that rippling effect.

00:53:42.000 --> 00:53:45.000
Which principle do you think would create the most

00:53:45.000 --> 00:53:47.000
meaningful impact.

00:53:47.000 --> 00:53:48.000
Just quickly.

00:53:48.000 --> 00:53:52.000
I think the principle that it's not about money,

00:53:52.000 --> 00:53:56.000
It is about you. It is about your presence.

00:53:56.000 --> 00:54:02.000
in your child's life as an observer, as a listener, and as a modeler,

00:54:02.000 --> 00:54:07.000
of the behaviors and the securities you want your kids to grow up with.

00:54:07.000 --> 00:54:08.000
For sure.

00:54:08.000 --> 00:54:12.000
That is… that is so true. And that ability…

00:54:12.000 --> 00:54:18.000
To be able to ask, and as you mentioned this, who, what, when, where, why, and how, when they say something,

00:54:18.000 --> 00:54:20.000
Just ask, who was involved?

00:54:20.000 --> 00:54:25.000
Where'd that happen? When did it happen? How did it happen? Why did it happen?

00:54:25.000 --> 00:54:28.000
Because that Y can be so important.

00:54:28.000 --> 00:54:31.000
And what I think you're saying, building that culture.

00:54:31.000 --> 00:54:32.000
Right.

00:54:32.000 --> 00:54:34.000
And that knowledge going forward, right?

00:54:34.000 --> 00:54:39.000
Right, and the key here, too, is parents find that they don't have any time.

00:54:39.000 --> 00:54:42.000
These things don't take a lot of time.

00:54:42.000 --> 00:54:53.000
They're almost transient. You can… you can listen, observe, and model on the way to taking your kids to school. You can do that on the way to cooking… while you're cooking dinner.

00:54:53.000 --> 00:54:58.000
go through your calendar and say, where do I buy time?

00:54:58.000 --> 00:54:59.000
And how do I set up routines?

00:54:59.000 --> 00:55:02.000
And sometimes…

00:55:02.000 --> 00:55:09.000
That's so true, and sometimes, doesn't that, when we say we don't have time,

00:55:09.000 --> 00:55:10.000
Abs… abs…

00:55:10.000 --> 00:55:11.000
Isn't that that false evidence about reality, called fear? We don't want

00:55:11.000 --> 00:55:20.000
To put that time out there, because we don't know what to do, so we think we have something else that we need to do, we're busy,

00:55:20.000 --> 00:55:21.000
Right?

00:55:21.000 --> 00:55:22.000
We're not accomplishing anything when that simple amount of time

00:55:22.000 --> 00:55:25.000
Given to a child, a family member,

00:55:25.000 --> 00:55:29.000
somebody that's employed by you, even somebody you report to,

00:55:29.000 --> 00:55:32.000
Giving them time, and that listing, as you mentioned,

00:55:32.000 --> 00:55:35.000
can change the world, right?

00:55:35.000 --> 00:55:39.000
Absolutely, it can change.

00:55:39.000 --> 00:55:40.000
You can.

00:55:40.000 --> 00:55:41.000
everything. And they just need

00:55:41.000 --> 00:55:45.000
To understand that it doesn't need to be a lot of time. And I say to parents,

00:55:45.000 --> 00:55:49.000
If you are sitting in a line for a Starbucks coffee in the morning,

00:55:49.000 --> 00:55:53.000
That's 10, 15, 20 minutes you can give your kid.

00:55:53.000 --> 00:55:54.000
That is…

00:55:54.000 --> 00:56:00.000
You need to find the time, because this is the priority. It's intentional parenting that we need.

00:56:00.000 --> 00:56:02.000
And like you said, find the time. The time's right there.

00:56:02.000 --> 00:56:03.000
Yep.

00:56:03.000 --> 00:56:05.000
make use of the time, right?

00:56:05.000 --> 00:56:06.000
Right. Right.

00:56:06.000 --> 00:56:07.000
Here it is! Ask those questions.

00:56:07.000 --> 00:56:09.000
Yep. Small moments.

00:56:09.000 --> 00:56:10.000
Bring up those ideas.

00:56:10.000 --> 00:56:12.000
Yep, small moments.

00:56:12.000 --> 00:56:13.000
Go ahead.

00:56:13.000 --> 00:56:15.000
for big opportunities.

00:56:15.000 --> 00:56:17.000
Small moments for big opportunities.

00:56:17.000 --> 00:56:20.000
Wow, Rosemary, thank you for sharing your heart.

00:56:20.000 --> 00:56:23.000
Your wisdom and your experience with us today. Your perspective.

00:56:23.000 --> 00:56:25.000
You're welcome.

00:56:25.000 --> 00:56:29.000
you know, I appreciate it, because your perspective reminds us that growth…

00:56:29.000 --> 00:56:33.000
Is it all we need? It's just so much of what we can do.

00:56:33.000 --> 00:56:39.000
And how we can do it in the processes, and what we do each and every day.

00:56:39.000 --> 00:56:42.000
It's not about perfection. Only intention.

00:56:42.000 --> 00:56:45.000
To be intentional in what we do with it, listening.

00:56:45.000 --> 00:56:50.000
Be able to listen, care, and the willingness to show up for ourselves and others.

00:56:50.000 --> 00:56:51.000
Right.

00:56:51.000 --> 00:56:54.000
I am so grateful for that calmness.

00:56:54.000 --> 00:56:59.000
that clarity and encouragement that you're bringing in… into this conversation.

00:56:59.000 --> 00:57:01.000
As we talk about that.

00:57:01.000 --> 00:57:05.000
To our listeners, whether you're here online today, whether you're listening to this later,

00:57:05.000 --> 00:57:07.000
Thank you for spending the time with us.

00:57:07.000 --> 00:57:09.000
And for being part of a community,

00:57:09.000 --> 00:57:14.000
That belief's connection and unity truly matter.

00:57:14.000 --> 00:57:17.000
Rosemary has also made a thoughtful gift available to support you.

00:57:17.000 --> 00:57:19.000
As you take your next step forward.

00:57:19.000 --> 00:57:23.000
Put that QR code on the screen earlier.

00:57:23.000 --> 00:57:27.000
Or a contactor. I'll give you her information. Well, it's pretty easy, because either one of us…

00:57:27.000 --> 00:57:34.000
Just go out to www.roosemaryolinder.com. Rosemary, O-L-E-N-D-E-R,

00:57:34.000 --> 00:57:37.000
Get out there, communicate with her.

00:57:37.000 --> 00:57:39.000
I encourage you to explore it.

00:57:39.000 --> 00:57:41.000
Continue that journey,

00:57:41.000 --> 00:57:45.000
And build that confidence, that purpose in your own life.

00:57:45.000 --> 00:57:49.000
Because through that, we can be strengthening relationships.

00:57:49.000 --> 00:57:52.000
As she mentions, one moment.

00:57:52.000 --> 00:57:56.000
at a time, personally and professionally.

00:57:56.000 --> 00:57:58.000
It's a mindset of value.

00:57:58.000 --> 00:58:03.000
Not just an ideal. Some mindset about that… mindset of value

00:58:03.000 --> 00:58:09.000
Knowing all sides to these important concepts, like living with purpose.

00:58:09.000 --> 00:58:13.000
Not pressure. And, like unity.

00:58:13.000 --> 00:58:16.000
shows us that there are… they are success.

00:58:16.000 --> 00:58:19.000
focused strategies.

00:58:19.000 --> 00:58:22.000
that are a daily choice for each of us to lead with empathy,

00:58:22.000 --> 00:58:26.000
Act with integrity, and uplift others along the way.

00:58:26.000 --> 00:58:29.000
This is a service that we can share with others,

00:58:29.000 --> 00:58:31.000
at no cost.

00:58:31.000 --> 00:58:34.000
Just like she mentioned, talking to your child,

00:58:34.000 --> 00:58:37.000
Our friend. And it's…

00:58:37.000 --> 00:58:41.000
Drive-thru line. Use it. Gain much more value.

00:58:41.000 --> 00:58:44.000
From those times and those actions.

00:58:44.000 --> 00:58:47.000
So, if anything, any kind of inspiration…

00:58:47.000 --> 00:58:49.000
came from what Rosemary shared today.

00:58:49.000 --> 00:58:53.000
Connect with her. Find her on LinkedIn.

00:58:53.000 --> 00:58:58.000
Go to her www.roosemaryolinder.com site, connect with her.

00:58:58.000 --> 00:59:01.000
If you have something with Achievement Unity,

00:59:01.000 --> 00:59:03.000
Go to www.achievingunity.com.

00:59:03.000 --> 00:59:07.000
www.marktrican.com.

00:59:07.000 --> 00:59:09.000
So the rosemary has helped us.

00:59:09.000 --> 00:59:12.000
create a unity between each other.

00:59:12.000 --> 00:59:16.000
Within ourselves, a clarifying vision,

00:59:16.000 --> 00:59:20.000
Aligning daily action, those small moments.

00:59:20.000 --> 00:59:24.000
And taking that first meaningful step toward a life where we can

00:59:24.000 --> 00:59:27.000
Truly put our wallets away.

00:59:27.000 --> 00:59:32.000
And raise rich kids. It's so, so beautiful.

00:59:32.000 --> 00:59:36.000
So, Rosemary, any last comments before we close?

00:59:36.000 --> 00:59:47.000
No, just that, um, I wish everybody well, and it is a journey, and you'll make mistakes, own them, talk about them, let your kids know why you think it was a mistake.

00:59:47.000 --> 00:59:50.000
Just open communication will…

00:59:50.000 --> 00:59:54.000
make the bonds and connections within the families tighter.

00:59:54.000 --> 00:59:57.000
And it will make your kids trust you, and come to you.

00:59:57.000 --> 00:59:58.000
So much more.

00:59:58.000 --> 01:00:00.000
When they have issues.

01:00:00.000 --> 01:00:04.000
That is so true, I liked the way you said that, too, because if you communicate with them earlier…

01:00:04.000 --> 01:00:06.000
They will communicate with you later.

01:00:06.000 --> 01:00:08.000
when both of you need it the most.

01:00:08.000 --> 01:00:09.000
Mm-hmm.

01:00:09.000 --> 01:00:15.000
So, until next time, let us continue to transform that complexity that we think we see every day

01:00:15.000 --> 01:00:17.000
into execution.

01:00:17.000 --> 01:00:20.000
those actions. Transform that chaos.

01:00:20.000 --> 01:00:24.000
into connection, and our purposes into action.

01:00:24.000 --> 01:00:29.000
Let us continue achieving unity. www.achievingunity.com.

01:00:29.000 --> 01:00:37.000
Hollis, 303-362-8733, which is what on your keypad?

01:00:37.000 --> 01:00:42.000
303 Focus, which I hope you will always remember.

01:00:42.000 --> 01:00:49.000
We can stay focused on turning chaos into connection as we achieve unity by harnessing the power

01:00:49.000 --> 01:00:51.000
of encouraging.

01:00:51.000 --> 01:00:55.000
inspiring, and including others in building better businesses?

01:00:55.000 --> 01:00:57.000
better lives, and a better world.

01:00:57.000 --> 01:01:03.000
This is Mark Idrikin with the Acheba Unity Leadership System, reminding you that life is truly

01:01:03.000 --> 01:01:05.000
What we make it.

01:01:05.000 --> 01:01:08.000
So let us help people feel seen.

01:01:08.000 --> 01:01:10.000
heard and supported

01:01:10.000 --> 01:01:13.000
through those everyday moments, as Rosemary has talked about,

01:01:13.000 --> 01:01:18.000
That truly matter. You make life awesome together.

01:01:18.000 --> 01:01:24.000
in unity. Thank you all. Thank you, Rosemary. Rosemary Olender, O-L-E-N-D-E-R.

01:01:24.000 --> 01:01:26.000
Go to our website.

01:01:26.000 --> 01:01:28.000
Remember, you would say something? I'm sorry?

01:01:28.000 --> 01:01:31.000
No, I was just going to say, my pleasure. Thank you.

01:01:31.000 --> 01:01:34.000
You bet. Thank you for being here, for your message.

01:01:34.000 --> 01:01:40.000
You're helping others, showing up for one another, and again, those small moments that mean so much.

01:01:40.000 --> 01:01:42.000
that make a big difference.

01:01:42.000 --> 01:01:46.000
To put your wallet away, give that knowledge and that sharing, that time,

01:01:46.000 --> 01:01:49.000
Because through your time, and your commitment,

01:01:49.000 --> 01:01:51.000
You make everyone…

01:01:51.000 --> 01:01:54.000
think better, act better, feel better.

01:01:54.000 --> 01:02:00.000
Rosemary, thank you so much. Everyone, all the audience, I hope to see you all again next week.

01:02:00.000 --> 01:02:07.000
Till then. Cheers!

Episode 69 - Rosemary Olender

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Guest: Rosemary Olender

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